Franklin Giovinn

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Franklin Giovinn is an odd fellow who runs a shrine to Squimble, the giant marshmallow, on the northeast part of the Isle of Gods in Ankh-Morpork.

If you ask him to heal you, he will, in exchange for five dollars, inflict a variety of ailments upon you. These include:

You exclaim: Heal me!
Franklin Giovinn says: So, Ilde, you wish to allow Squimble's majesty to suffuse your body and heal your wounds.
Franklin Giovinn asks: Squimble will, of course, require a small donation for the trouble. About five dollars should do it. Is that acceptable?
You say: Yes
Franklin Giovinn says: Ah, that's excellent.
You pay Franklin Giovinn.
Franklin Giovinn leads you through some blinds into an inner sanctum.
This area of the shrine has been cleared of clutter.  The floorboards, walls and ceiling are now home to a whole host of candles, which shine with a surprisingly powerful light, making this a very disorienting place to be.
There is one obvious exit: leave.
Franklin Giovinn enters, pushing the drapes aside.
Franklin Giovinn says: Now, we begin.
Franklin Giovinn exclaims: I call upon thee, O Squimble, Marshmallow of Great Size!
Franklin Giovinn throws a sparkling powder into the air.
Franklin Giovinn exclaims: Yes, thee, O Squimble, whose diameter exceeds several miles, whose weight could crush a city, of whose sugary flesh a single bite can render a person helpless with sugar rush!
Franklin Giovinn dances around you, waving a lit incense stick in the air.
Franklin Giovinn exclaims: O Squimble, greatest of the great marshmallows, grant me the power to heal this mortal!
Franklin Giovinn exclaims: By the light of Squimble, the demons of illness shall trouble you no more! By Squimble's power, you shall be healed!
Franklin Giovinn lays his hands upon you.
The world goes black! You are blind.
Someone says: Um... Oops. I do apologise. I, um... I... Sorry.
Franklin Giovinn leads you through some drapes back to the outer shrine.
You are blind, you can't see anything.