Cream pie

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A banana cream pie is a special type of food that you can play with.

This is a banana cream pie.  It is simply covered in whipped cream.  Not just covered, there's gobs and gobs of it on the thing.  You feel this sudden urge to slap, smear or chuck it at someone.
It looks nice and fresh.


You can make these for free on Cream Pie Day. The syntax for this is simply "make cream pie", after which you have a cream pie of your very own. However, if you try to make another one too soon afterwards, you get this message:

You made a cream pie less than 30 seconds ago.  Don't be greedy now.

On Cream Pie Day, you'll also get one when you log on, with this message:

You suddenly find a cream pie in your hand.  Weird, maybe it's some day to celebrate bad movies?

Alternatively, you can buy a banana cream pie from either the canteen in the Watch house on Pseudopolis Yard or a public dining room in the Academy of Artificers.

If you just want to be covered in pie, you can stand outside the Fool's Guild and hope one of their pies hits you.


Obviously, you can eat these. But you can also throw them at people, causing them to be covered in cream and crumbs! As you can see when you look at them, there are a few different ways to give someone a pie in the face.

Forms of syntax available for the command "slap":
slap <object> into <living> face then run <string>
Forms of syntax available for the command "smear":
smear <object> into <living> [face]
Forms of syntax available for the command "chuck":
chuck <object> at <living>

When someone has been covered in pie, they'll have a description line indicating about how much pie is still on them. They'll also have periodic chats about cream dropping off or being wiped off, reducing the amount on them a bit at a time until it's all gone. Also, dogs in the room may lick the cream off or catch it as it falls.