Dead letter office jobs

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Ankh-Morpork Post Office by Quow
This page is about a source of missions / jobs.

Dead letter office jobs will have you acting as an unofficial postal employee for the Ankh-Morpork Post Office, delivering letters to citizens near and far (at your discretion).

The Job

To see what the kind of letters there are, you can check pigeonholes for a brief list. One can also read pigeonholes for a verbose listing, though it provides no additional information.

You can pick a type of letter from those listed on the pigeonholes to offer to deliver <letter code>, ex. offer to deliver dlc

When the addressee is found, you can deliver letter to <npc>.

Inquiring

When you take on a mission to deliver a letter with a vague address, or only the city, you can inquire after addressee to find out more information. This is a skill check that uses the relevant people.culture skill for the area.

Mission Bonus for odds of success
Range ~ 0% ~ 50% Nearly always
Vague address ? 153 193
Only the city ? ? 239
  • Inquiring will tell you the type of npc (actor, monk, etc.) if the letter is not clear on that.
  • The appropriate npcs have the distinctive traits at the end of their description when you look at them.
  • The range to get bearing on the target is around 12-20 rooms away.
  • Most of the time the direction given will be (pure) south if you're not more than 2 east or west from the destination. It seems likely that rooms with opposite directions (say you need to go north and then later south to reach the target) cancel each other.
  • Paths to the target in a straight line with no intersections seem to extend the range somewhat.
  • The furthest range categories are often considerably shorter than the number of rooms in the table. This might be because of some kind of neighbourhood limits.
Message: that your target Meaning
isn't in the neighbourhood Beyond detection
was spotted in the <direction> a while back 12 to 16+ rooms away
was spotted in the <direction> not too long ago 9-15 rooms away
was spotted in the <direction> recently 3-8 rooms away
was spotted very close by not a moment ago 0-2 rooms away
met a brutal end Target dead
You find the language barrier to be insurmountable You need to speak <appropriate language> for the area

Vague address is easier in several ways:

  • An intersection is indicated.
  • If you are further away than ~17 rooms from the intersection inquire just says you are too far. (This might be fixed neighbourhood boundaries.)
  • The bonus needed is lower than for letters with only the city. (At least before the latest changes, need to confirm.)

Deciphering

The address of the letters with terrible handwriting has been quite obfuscated.

  • They can be deciphered with the command decipher handwriting on letter.
  • This is a skill check that uses crafts.arts.calligraphy and costs 40 GP.

Rewards

Method Abbreviation Mission XP reward Monetary reward Time given
Missing letters DLA Close by; smudged address 12800 XP &&&&&&&&&&&+2600 A$6.50 30 DW min / 9 RW min
Deciphering DLB Close by; terrible handwriting 25600 XP &&&&&&&&&&&+5200 A$13 30 DW min / 9 RW min
Inquiring DLC Close by; vague address 24128 XP &&&&&&&&&&&+4800 A$12 30 DW min / 9 RW min
Inquiring DLD Close by; only the city 47823 XP &&&&&&&&&&+10000 A$25 45 DW min / 13.5 RW min
Missing letters DLE Far away; smudged address 25600 XP &&&&&&&&&&&+4500 A$11.25 30 DW min / 9 RW min
Deciphering DLF Far away; terrible handwriting 27456 XP &&&&&&&&&&&+6000 A$15 &&&&&&&&&&&+5472 LC 3|2|- 30 DW min / 9 RW min
Inquiring DLG Far away; vague address 33440 XP &&&&&&&&&&&+7200 A$18 30 DW min / 9 RW min
Inquiring DLH Far away; only the city 50064 XP &&&&&&&&&&+10080 21Rh 45 DW min / 13.5 RW min
Surviving DLI Difficult customer varies varies 200 DW min - 3.33 DW hour / 1 RW hour (Thursday/Librarian)

Notes

Times listed with DW (Discworld) units above are in Roundworld minutes, times listed with RW (RoundWorld) units use earth conventional times.

The money you receive as payment is usually in the currency used in the location where the recipient happens to be when the letter is delivered.

If you lose the letter and would like to get another without waiting for the delivery time to expire, tell Frank that you would like to quit. You will still need to wait the ten Roundworld minutes before he will give you another one.

You cannot deliver while it is too dark for you to see the recipient.

Close-By

The npcs close-by for smudged address and terrible handwriting should be in the following table. If not please add them.

NPC Location
Ada Woonsocket Ankh-Morpork, Upper Broadway
Alfred Musqrat Ankh-Morpork, Sheer Street, Paint Shop
Anita Hurpley Ankh-Morpork, God's Collar, Battes Ande Cakes
Apold Blorkman Ankh-Morpork, West Ankh Ferry
Archemedies Ankh-Morpork, Artorollo Alley, Georgio's pizza place
Argule Wibbley Ankh-Morpork, Cockbill Street, Argule Wibbley's Pottery Shop
Arlof Eetmmot Ankh-Morpork, Plaza of Broken Moons, Arlof Eetmmot's Bakery
Barry Ankh-Morpork, Phedre Road, Jenn & Barry's Ice Cream Parlour
Benno Lacoste Ankh-Morpork, Prouts, Wine Warehouse
Bernita Ankh-Morpork, Treacle Street, Bernita's Flower Shop
Bertha Ankh-Morpork, God Street
Bligh Earcrusher Ankh-Morpork, Park Street, Bligh Earcrusher's exclusive shop
Brother David Ankh-Morpork, Short Street, The house of rest and safety
Cadmium Ankh-Morpork, Cable Street, Gimlet's Hole Food Delicatessen
Commander Samuel Vimes Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Yard Watch House, Ankh-Morpork City Watch
Constable Dorfl Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Yard Watch House, Ankh-Morpork City Watch
Constable Swires Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Watch House, Ankh-Morpork City Watch
Constable Visit Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Watch House, Ankh-Morpork City Watch
Count Notfarouto Ankh-Morpork, The Fresh Start Club, Elm Street. (Doesn't spawn there, might have to go at a meeting time)
Cubert Eiche Ankh-Morpork, Stuff for Fires, The Goose Gate
Cutta Ankh-Morpork, Cattle District, Pony Parts
Cynthia Potts Ankh-Morpork, Losing Street, Stop Losing Your Way
Dagmar Schmet Ankh-Morpork, The Street of Alchemists, Guild of Alchemists
Dame Sufferland Ankh-Morpork, The Salt Shaker, Upper Broadway
Danlin Ankh-Morpork, Flood Walk, The Groaning Platter Tavern
Darren Spangler Ankh-Morpork, Sator Square, Magical Emporium
David Wobbler Ankh-Morpork, Artorollo Alley
Del Trotter Ankh-Morpork, Caveat Emptorium, Trotters Lane
Derek Wadley Ankh-Morpork, Alguinna Alley, Cheese Shop
Dhraz Shaftrubble Ankh-Morpork, Iron Helmet
Dimitris Ankh-Morpork, Dimwell Street, Dimitris' Dummies
Doctor Bones Ankh-Morpork, Monk's Hospital, The Pitts
Dogbottler Ankh-Morpork, Short Street
Doss Chiderdoss Ankh-Morpork, Street of the Alchemists
Drakko Ankh-Morpork, Salt Shaker, Flat 2
Edward Scrooge Ankh-Morpork, The Street of Alchemists, Guild of Alchemists
Ella Montigue Ankh-Morpork, Shop on n-w corner of Dolly Sisters
Emmaline Lamb Ankh-Morpork, Pleaders Row, Emmaline Lamb's World of Baskets
Fat Sandra Ankh-Morpork, Squeezebelly Alley, Fat Sally's coffee house
Felicity Hopkinson Ankh-Morpork, Dwarf Bread Museum, Whirligig Alley
Flyn Skint Ankh-Morpork, The Waterfront, Flyn's Place
Fred Ankh-Morpork, Endless Street, Fred's Emporium and Clothing Shop
Fred Sylver Ankh-Morpork, Washer Way, Sylver's
Geoffrey Ankh-Morpork, God Street (in Bertha's House)
Georgio Artorollo Alley, Georgio's pizza place
Geremiah Codger Ankh-Morpork, Widdershins Broadway
Gerry Watkins Ankh-Morpork, Dimwell Street
Gimlet Ankh-Morpork, Cable Street, Gimlet's Hole Food Delicatessen
Gladys Ankh-Morpork, Bob's Fish Shoppe, Street of Cunning Artificers
Goran Ankh Bridge Imports, Ankh-Morpork
Gore Batchev Ankh-Morpork, Ankh Street, Batchev's World of Maps
Gunther Ankh-Morpork, Market Street, Costlee Coffee
Gwawr Clwyd Ankh-Morpork, Phedre Road, Tannery
Halley Toomer Ankh-Moprok, Scoone Avenue, Toomer Stationers
Ham Burgner Ankh-Morpork, The Maul, Burgner's Coffee on the Maul
Harmony Stardancer Ankh-Morpork, Treacle Street, Harmony Stardancer's Magical Shoppe
Harold Cobbler Ankh-Morpork, 1_ Elm Street (western end)
Henufi Icta Ankh-Morpork, The Soake, The Laughing Falafel
Hibiscus Dunelm Ankh-Morpork, The Mended Drum, Filigree Street
Hurple Ankh-Morpork, Cockbill Street, Hurple's towel shop
Hwel Ankh-Morpork, Isle of Gods, The Dysk
Igor Ankh-Morpork, The Forge, Cable Street (opposite Cutankle's, upstairs)
Inga Ankh-Morpork, The Pain in the Neck
Ixolite Ankh-Morpork, Fresh Start Club, Elm Street
Not always there - possibly appears in the room to the east of the club room.
Jabez Clamber Ankh-Morpork, Grunefair, antique jewellery shop
Jacinthe Bockxse Ankh-Morpork, Ankh Street, Batchev's World of Maps
Jack Banks Ankh-Morpork, God's Collar, Starbanks
John Tetzel Ankh-Morpork, The Street of Small Gods, Tetzel's Indulgences
Kenneth Ankh-Morpork, Market Street
Kernab Ankh-Morpork, Kernab's Weaponry Store, Treacle Street
Kodattai Ankh-Morpork, The Cattle District
Kurr Ency Ankh-Morpork, The Pitts, The Coin Corner
Lady Timatis Ankh-Morpork, God's Collar, Escort Agency reception (ask receptionist for appointment)
Lilith Z. Dharienne Ankh-Morpork, Body Street, Karma 'R' Us
Liona Keeble Ankh-Morpork, Cheap Street, Keeble's Job Shop
Little Jimmy Ankh-Morpork, Endless St, Souvenir Shop (by Least Gate)
Luciano Flabbarotti Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Yard, The Stab in the Back
Madame Dawning Ankh-Morpork, Madame Dawning’s Palliaments, One Pseudopolis Yard
Madame Gumble Ankh-Morpork, Cockbill Street, Madame Gumble's Jewellery
Manuel Fawlty Ankh-Morpork, God Street, The Curry Gardens
Mardi Ankh-Morpork, Phedre Road, Craf__Co_r_, Masqueparade
Maria Ankh-Morpork, Phedre Road, Poster Shop
Marvin Ankh-Morpork, Marvin's Mantels, The Street of Cunning Artificers
Master Nimbledrit Ankh-Morpork, Master Nimbledrit's shop of Crafting Equipment, Ettercap Street
Maximiliam Dimlith Ankh-Morpork, Green Lumpy Bit, outside a plilosophical looking building
Miss Ha'penny Ankh-Morpork, Offices in the middle of Speedwell Street, first set s-w of Ankh Morpork Council building
Mo Astor Ankh-Morpork, Cattle District, Baron Street, Frenly Money Changerz
Monsieur Rosset Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Yard, Monsieur Rosset's Hairdressing Salon
Mr Cranwell Ankh-Morpork, The street of Cunning Artificers, The Engravers
Mr Cropper Ankh-Morpork, The Print Shop, Pseudopolis Yard, Isle of the Gods
Mr Goatberger Ankh-Morpork, The Print Shop, Pseudopolis Yard, Isle of the Gods
Mr. Goodmountain Ankh-Morpork, Gleam Street, busy printing room
Mr Graves Ankh-Morpork, The premises of Grangrid, Graves, and Descendants, Chrononhotonthologos Street
Mr Lumiere Ankh-Morpork, Market Street
Mr. Manson Ankh-Morpork, Elm Street, Elm Street Mortuary
Mrs. Armitage Ankh-Morpork, Loom Alley, Embroidery Shop
Mrs. Confectionairre Ankh-Morpork, Salis Street, Confections De Confectionairre
Mr. Scoonwinkle Ankh-Morpork, Hopper Street, Scoonwinkle's Shoe Store
Mrs Corduroy Ankh-Morpork, Chrononhotonthologos Street, Mrs Corduroy's Stuffed Animals
Mrs Dimmles Ankh-Morpork, Mrs Dimmles' Open-All-Hours cafe, Dimwell Street
Mrs. Dodger Ankh-Morpork, Isle of Gods, Pseudopolis Yard Watch House
Mrs Green Ankh-Morpork, Zephire Street, Second Hand Shop
Mr. Stronginthearm Ankh-Morpork, Lower Broadway, Weaponsmith
Mrs Vera Johannes Ankh-Morpork, Spa Lane, Milords & Miladies
Mr Vitiolo Ankh-Morpork, Brookless Lane, Calligraphy shop
Ms Estible Ankh-Morpork, The Willows, The Head of the Table
Murgatroyd Listey Ankh-Morpork, Souvenir Shop, Humble Street
Nathan Ankh-Morpork, The Curio Shop, Artorollo Alley
Nese Stenzelle Ankh-Morpork, Phedre Road, Nese's Fine Decor
Old Bob Ankh-Morpork, The Flintwick Building
Old Crumble Ankh-Morpork, The Bucket
Olson Ankh-Morpork, Water Street, Olson's Iron Shop
Onna Hitokui Ankh-Morpork, Upper Broadway, The Salt Shaker
Patrice Le Clair Ankh-Morpork, The Goose Gate (market stall)
Pierre Grepe Ankh-Morpork, Vino pour la Femme et le Homme, God’s Collar
Placido Flamingo Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Yard, The Stab in the Back
Ptom Psmith Ankh-Morpork, East Ankh Ferry
Rattigan Ankh-Morpork, God's Collar, rat infested house
Rebecca Palm Ankh-Morpork, Sator Square, Magical Supplies Emporium, Rebecca Palm's Clothing
Reg Shoe Ankh-Morpork, Mrs Cake's house, Elm Street (Fresh Start Club, Elm Street on Thursdays at midnight)
Renee Palm Ankh-Morpork, Scoone Avenue, Djinn's Famous Flying Carpets
Rinaldo Ankh-Morpork, The Mouldy Cellar, Chrononhotonthologos Street
Roffle Ankh-Morpork, Upper Broadway (wanders)
Roger Ankh-Morpork, Patrician's Palace, north of the Flame Board
Sandra Ankh-Morpork, Lower Broadway, Guild of Playwrights
Scheda Carte Ankh-Morpork, Attic Bee Street, Card Shop
Septa DeBlano Ankh-Morpork, Street of Small Gods, Temple of Small Gods
Sergeant Littlebottom Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Yard Watch House
Sergeant Skyler Ankh-Morpork, Ankh-Morpork City Watch, Long Wall Watch House
Seymour Convecks Ankh-Morpork, Cheesemongers Yard, The Optometrist's
Shapaya Ankh-Morpork, Apartment on Grunefair
Shmata Ankh-Morpork, Misbegot Bridge
Sneed Finkman Ankh-Morpork, outside the Ankh-Morpork Post Office
Sol Ankh-Morpork, Thieves' Guild
Spanky Ankh-Morpork, God's Collar, Armourer
Starspirit Moonfire Ankh-Morpork, Krazzander's Magik Shoppe, Cockbill Street
Stren Withel Ankh-Morpork, Filigree Street, The Mended Drum
Thomas Eddiessonson Ankh-Morpork, Cable Street, The Forge
Thom Crooze Ankh-Morpork, Pseudopolis Yard, All Bar None
Time Wemple Ankh-Morpork, Body Street, Rainbow Homeopaths Incorporated
Too Bath Salts Ankh-Morpork, Little Agatea, "Bes Pelargic", Laundry House
Trioll Negurney Ankh-Morpork, Quality Victuals, Trioll Negurney's Cayke Shoppe
Turan Ankh-Morpork, Cattle District, Baron Street, Stylish Skullduggery
Urotho Ankh-Morpork, The Pitts, The Coin Pitt
Valerianne Ankh-Morpork, Elm Street, Valerianne's weapon and armour shop
Veebeel Ankh-Morpork, The Street of Cunning Artificers, Veebeel's fortune telling booth
Wiley Woonsocket Ankh-Morpork, Edgeway Road, Woonsocket's Delicatessen
William de Worde Ankh-Morpork, Printing Works, The Ankh-Morpork Times, Gleam Street
Wun Phul Ankh-Morpork, Little Agatea, Wun Phul Mouth's Hunghungese Restaurant
Yortuk Festrunk Ankh-Morpork, Prouts, Festrunk Brothers
Rimpog [An attendant] Sto Plains [Near Pekan Ford], Wizard Outpost [Raising Chamber]
Squinty Jeb Sto Plains, A Hut
Alberto Malich
* Albert
Death's Domain
Aloysius Habenpfeifer Hillshire, Tobacco Shop
Ruby Holy Wood, The Blue Lias
Director Holy Wood, Century of the Fruitbat Moving Pictures
Shopkeeper Nowhere
I don't know his name but he's pretty old and gnarled please find him
* gnarled old man
Nowhere
Sue Pekan Pekan Ford, Village Store
Tom Pekan Pekan Ford, Village Pub
Valentino Sheepridge, Valentino's Flower Stall
Findel Nordelsson Sto Lat, Heritage Hill, Souvenir Shop
Fleppo Sto Lat, Bathrobe shop, Royal Market
Gerard de Wendelle Sto Lat, Wall Street, Gerard de Wendelle's evening dress shop
Gerti Kotzbeck Sto Lat, Blueberry Lane, Gerti's Cake shop
Holly Cloverfield Sto Lat, Royal Market, The Rock-A-Rama jewellery shop
Isobel Kingdom Sto Lat, Academy of Artificers
Jack Straw Sto Lat, Garlic Grove
Madam Miliena Sto Lat, Garlic Grove, Olde Locket Shoppe
Master Gildworthy Sto Lat, Academy of Artificers
Miss Armitage Sto Lat, Queens Road
Miss Wylde Sto Lat, Queens Road, Wylde's Fashionable Ladies Wear
Mrs Willikins-Boydle Sto Lat, Queens Road
Mysteria della Noctis Sto Lat, Queen's Road, The Dragon Emporium
Nils Beerman Sto Lat, Cabbage Street, Nils Beerman's Light Store
Omar Amahl Sto Lat, Cabbage Street, Omar Amahl's Jewellery Shop
Oncle Hamash Sto Lat, Frozen Alley, Oncle Hamash Bookshop
Paul Zombo Sto Lat, King's Road, Guard Room
Peter Periwinkle Sto Lat, Hill Street, Pet Shop
Quinbury Soames Sto Lat, Quirm Street, Stationer's Shop
Ragman Sto Lat, Grave's Hope
The Proprietor
* blacksmith
Sto Lat, The Royal Market Smithy
Tony Robinson Sto Lat, Cabbage Street, Tony Robinson's Bar

DLA: Close by; smudged address

Some letters in the address are missing. See the npc table at the beginning of this section.

DLB: Close by; terrible handwriting

See #Deciphering. See the npc table at the beginning of this section.

DLC: Close by; vague address

See #Inquiring.

DLD: Close by; only the city

See #Inquiring.

Far Away

The npcs far away for smudged address and terrible handwriting should be in the following table. If not please add them.

NPC Location Region
Scuttle Me Own Canoe Dihbl / SMOC Dihbl Calh-Nhad Klatch
Dil the Embalmer Djelibeybi, Embalmers' guild Klatch
Khip-en-dahl Djelibeybi, Queen Ptraci furniture shop Klatch
Master Bibh-Lat Djelibeybi, Phoenix Road, Silversmith Klatch
Merk Djelibeybi, Phoenix Road, Merk's Mephit Messengers Klatch
Ptep-ptip-ptop Djelibeybi, Pottery shop, Tsort Road Klatch
Ptik-ptak-ptoe Djelibeybi, Hourglass shop Klatch
Pugh Alighieri Djelibeybi, Sickle Street, Alcohol shop Klatch
Teh-takk-eht Djelibeybi, Temple street Klatch
Toohumi Djelibeybi, Market Street, Toohumi's Illuminations Klatch
Ug Ogg Djelibeybi, Djelian Guard Klatch
Wan-tew-iit Djelibeybi, barracks' kitchen Klatch
Arms trader Djelibeybi Harbour Klatch
Awaiting-Rain Djelibeybi Harbour Klatch
Captain Ptargos Djelibeybi Harbour, Brazen Mermaid Klatch
Fis'n-tsips Djelibeybi Harbour, Happy Melon Inn Klatch
One of them Dibblers with a long name
* May-I-be-Dipped-in-My-Own-Grease Dih-bah-lah
Djelibeybi Harbour Klatch
71-hour Ahmed Tacticum (get El Kinte Caravan from Djelibeybi) Klatch
Private Inside Leg Klatchian Foreign Legion outpost storage tent Klatch
Suhm-wil-deih Oasis, Fig Stall (tent in the southwest part of the Oasis) Klatch
Abraxas Ephebe, Rational Street Klatch
Ania Ephebe, Logical Lane, the Flaming Ram's Skull Club Klatch
Arimasticopoulous the Mosaicist Ephebe, Rational Street Alleyway Klatch
Aurinax Ephebe, Antithesis lane, jewellery repair shop Klatch
Betty Ephebe, Morporkian Tearoom (tea shop close to the Bing bank) Klatch
Endos the Listener Ephebe, Antithesis Lane Klatch
Kakia Ephebe, Logical Lane, the Flaming Ram's Skull Club Klatch
Klepton Ephebe, Ponder Alley Klatch
Maintenance man Ephebe, Citadel Klatch
Master Zosimos Ephebe, Paradox Avenue, A murky little shop
* Zosimos' Wine Shop
Klatch
Rimasticopoulous the Mosaicist Ephebe, Rational Street Alleyway Klatch
Souvlakios Ephebe, Tuvelpit Road Klatch
The owner Ephebe, Market Taverna Klatch
Xenophobios Ephebe, Logical Lane, Amaryllis' Taverna Klatch
Emile Bois, pub Vieux River
A generic Charre Bux employee Genua, Charre Bux Coffee House Vieux River
Ayna Genua, Thee Magick Boxe Vieux River
Blloddwyn Genua, 'Y Crochan Ddu' Tavern Vieux River
Brittnee Genua, Savannah Road, Brittnee's Message Tees Vieux River
Captain Merreaux Vingian Genua, Musketeers Vieux River
Cogsworth Genua, Cogsworth's Clocks, Trade Street Vieux River
David Leatherman Genua, Marketplace, Leatherworking stall Vieux River
Edna Scum Genua, The Scum Bar, Pirate Avenue Vieux River
Fredd S'Vage Genua, Calypso Street, The Baron's Hand Vieux River
Harbour Master Genua, Office near docks Vieux River
Harbour mistress Genua, underground docks Vieux River
Hotel Reception Genua, Hotel Vieux River
Jolly Roger Genua, Pirate Avenue, pirate shop Vieux River
Mamie Olivia Genua, Dead Man's Walk Vieux River
Mr Ray Genua, Tacticus Academy Vieux River
Mr Myrtle Genua, Silver Bells Silversmiths Vieux River
Myrtle Genua, Silver Bells Silversmiths Vieux River
Mrs Gogol Genua, Marketplace Vieux River
Sno-ball vendor Genua, Lovers' Walk Vieux River
Spritz Peltanque Genua, The Resting Zombie Vieux River
Talula Genua, Talula's Tintillating Toys ([sic] shop is actually called Talula's Titillating Toys) Vieux River
The shopkeeper Genua, Chandlery in Genua Avenue Vieux River
The tipster
* Andy 'the joker' DeAngelis
* Billy 'the baker' Vanilla
* Eric 'the weasel' Episcopia
* Henry 'show me the money' DeVaughn
* Louis 'brace yourself' Guidice
* Luca 'the beard' DeBois
* Luca 'the joker' DeBois
* Michael 'the moose' Casella
* Mikey 'the falcon' Episcopia
* Sammy 'the whip' Episcopia
* Vincent 'four fingers' Accardo
* Vinnie 'two fingers' Giancana
Genua, Lady Brook Street, racecourse, grimy bar Vieux River
Thom Cru'ez Genua, Barracks Vieux River
Watch clerk Genua, Watch House Vieux River
Wounded soldier Genua, Barracks Vieux River
Cern Smith Bad Ass Ramtops
Granny Weatherwax Bad Ass (Witches' Guild) Ramtops
Gulta Smith Bad Ass Ramtops
Hanlo Shepston Bad Ass, The Forge Ramtops
Jaims Smith Bad Ass Ramtops
Kev Ogg / Mr. Ogg Bad Ass, Forge Ramtops
Martha Headlock Bad Ass, Village Shop Ramtops
Mrs Smith Bad Ass Ramtops
Cohen the Barbarian Barbarian Camp Ramtops
Fern Golly Brass Neck, Brightly coloured (toy) stall Ramtops
Granville Brass Neck, Village Shop Ramtops
Virgo Vango Brass Neck (Portrait Shop) Ramtops
Dia Shale Creel Springs Ramtops
Esther Elderbury Creel Springs Ramtops
Monster Lancre Pool Ramtops
Bestiality Carter Lancre Town Ramtops
Brother Turbil Lancre Town, lodging house Ramtops
Embezile Thatcher Lancre Town, Lancrastian Farmers' Cooperative Bank Ramtops
J. Ogg Lancre Town, forge Ramtops
giant leader land of the giants Ramtops
Len Mad Stoat, Looney Len's Pottery Shop Ramtops
Maggie Mad Stoat (beside pond) Ramtops
Nicholas Winston Mad Stoat, Winston Puppets Ramtops
Serb Unglish Mad Stoat Ramtops
Sharn Unglish Mad Stoat Ramtops
Our Wullie Mad Wolf, The Hunter's Head Ramtops
Stephan Mad Wolf, Mad Wolf Furriers Ramtops
Young Steven Mad Wolf, The Hunter's Head Ramtops
Vic Ohulan-Cutash, Vic's tannery Ramtops
Twoflower the tourist Ohulan-Cutash, Fiddler's Riddle Ramtops
My poor kidnapped daughter
* beautiful female captive
Bandit camp (very dangerous) Ramtops
Allen Kingfisher Blackglass, Blackglass smithy Ramtops
Morchella Esculenta Blackglass, Undead Defence Shop Ramtops
Abbot Lobsang Listening Monks, Private quarters of the abbot Ramtops
Brother Hotpot Listening Monks, Kitchen Ramtops
Asap (Brother Asap) Monks of Cool temple (can be Cool Monks) Ramtops
Sister Bi-Bi Effenne Monks of Cool temple (can be Cool Monks) Ramtops
Sister Ti-Ti Effenne Monks of Cool temple (can be Cool Monks) Ramtops
Aggressive Pixie (Water Sprite) Razorback (Sprite Cavern) Ramtops
Gammer Nudity Razorback, Mad Gammer Nudity's cottage Ramtops
Heinz Blauhimmel Razorback, village shop Ramtops
Lichtenstein Razorback, The Inn Ramtops
Mad Gammer Nudity Razorback Ramtops
Candice Little Slice, Quilter shop Ramtops
Cleetus Patterson Slice, Cleetus Patterson's Diuerse Supplies Ramtops
Granma Muckloe Slice Ramtops
Peggy Little Slice, Quilting shop Ramtops
Ann Celeria Slippery Hollow, Stationary Shop (from carriage stop: n,n,w,w,w,w,w,w) Ramtops
Doctor Lancreman Slippery Hollow (from carriage stop: e,e,s) Ramtops
Hardenfast Slippery Hollow (courthouse) Ramtops
Honest Dachshund
*Frank Doberman
Slippery Hollow, Moon Under Water Tavern Ramtops
Irkabod Stork Slippery Hollow (manor) Ramtops
Kortina Van Dryver
*Miss Van Dryer
Slippery Hollow (manor) Ramtops
Mr Smith (Mr Shopkeeper) Slippery Hollow, Tannery Supply Shop Ramtops
Mrs Van Carrot Slippery Hollow Ramtops
My good friend at the post office Slippery Hollow (post office) Ramtops
One and Only Manclef Slippery Hollow Ramtops
Shopkeeper Bunch Slippery Hollow (Slippery Hollow General Store) Ramtops
The Magistrate
*Magistrate Flathead
Slippery Hollow (courthouse) Ramtops
Young Bran Slippery Hollow Ramtops
Temple Guardian (templeguard) Temple of Soyin
* Warning: Watch out for auto-attacking [[yeti
Ramtops |yetis]]!
Fione mac Feegle Uberwald (Pictsie Barrows) Ramtops
The Proprietor
*shopkeeping native
Brown Islands, Souvenir Shop
*The Brown Islands, Souvenir Shop
Turnwise Ocean
DEATH Death's realm
*(No location! Maybe because DEATH is everywhere, potentially anyway.)
Sto Plains
A maitre d' Sto Lat, The Hammered Cat Sto Plains
Fleppo Sto Lat, Bathrobe Shop Sto Plains
Isobel Kingdom Sto Lat, Academy of Artificers Sto Plains
Gerard de Wendelle Evening Dress Shop, Wall Street, Sto Lat Sto Plains
Clara Escrow (Candle Cave) Uberwald
Ema Nymton Escrow (fair grounds) Uberwald
Ivor von Kaeyya Escrow (The Count's Seat, Briar Way) Uberwald
SMOH Dybbler Escrow (Mother Dybbler Potion Shop) Uberwald
Trau Mirnicht Escrow (tent in fair) Uberwald
Verkauft Keinfleisch Escrow (The Meat Pie Shoppe, Garlic Way) Uberwald
Abe A town (Unnamed town, graveyard) Uberwald
Innkeeper The Slaughtered Lamb, Unnamed town Uberwald
Spiegal Unnamed town, Ye Olde Weapons Shoppe Uberwald

DLE: Far away; smudged address

Some letters in the address are missing. See the npc table at the beginning of this section.

DLF: Far away; terrible handwriting

See #Deciphering. See the npc table at the beginning of this section.

DLG: Far away; vague address

See #Inquiring.

DLH: Far away; only the city

See #Inquiring.

DLI: Difficult customer

Difficult customers generally attack on sight or are very hard to reach.

Letters are limited, probably a maximum of 3-5 letters (possibly only 2) can be in circulation at any point. This means that if you log out with a letter, that's less one letter that can be delivered. If you got your hands on a letter and the target is dead, while it's entirely up to you, it might be better to hand it right back to Frank and wait that 10 minutes to get another letter rather than holding it till the NPC spawn. Certain NPCs like the smuggler captain or Triad Boss are almost always dead due to being hotspots. Please don't log out with difficult letters. You're making it hard for other fellow letter couriers.

NPC Exp Coins Location
Triad Boss Bes Pelargic, Medina
The Grflx 48160 &&&&&&&&&&+10000 A$25.00 Skund Forest, Large cave
Vyrt 35280 &&&&&&&&&&&+7104 S37|0de Ephebe
Spawns at A seafood-scented edge of the Harbour Market [s,w,nw,se,sw].
Avalanche Preventore
(large metallic dragon)
96000 &&&&&&&&&&+20000 A$50.00 Endless Halls (say 'Endless Halls' to Hermal of Sandelfon)
The Librarian 60000 Starts in the Unseen University, wanders (in L-space)
Smuggler captain 48000 &&&&&&&&&&&+9600 1M|0de Ephebe underground
Queen Shelox 56784 &&&&&&&&&&+12000 A$30.00 Gloomy Forest
The Clown (Ha'pennywise) 111360 &&&&&&&&&&+22500 7,5,0Gf Genua Sewers
Ice giants 96320 &&&&&&&&&&+20000 A$50.00 The Hub
Also found in the icefields surrounding the hub - which is safer for wizards and easier to recover corpses from due to the lack of background thaums.
T-shop proprietor 64000 &&&&&&&&&&+14400 1M S25|0de The Travelling shop
Bug 68640 &&&&&&&&&&+13536 LC 7|10|- Ramtops
Thursday 102959 &&&&&&&&&&+20640 43Rh A Deserted Island (Thursday's Island)
Hotan Hwoar Ni 48160 &&&&&&&&&&+12040 25Rh 10s Bes Pelargic, Sum Bing, The Snail, Hotan Hwoar Ni's Rare Armours
"Be On Your Guard" : A bug that made it possible to slip past the guarding NPCs in the Snail has been fixed.
Security guards 21924 &&&&&&&&&&&+4380 9Rh 15s Bes Pelargic, First Imperial Bank

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